Filed under: Grace
i had no idea how this dinner was going to go for E and i. our evening was already tense as i had to do a photo shoot earlier with rain and traffic it was almost grim. i was quiet as we waited for our table, we had small talk as i watched people around us. i remember hating the smell of a woman with too much wretched perfume as she attempted to wisp by me.
as we walked deep into the busy and loud dining room i glanced at tables looking at the drunken patrons. we were seated right in the center of all the snobbery. E chose the seat closest to me instead of across from me. as soon as we sat down i felt every bit of tension just go away. my focus was on E as we engaged in conversations about our art and it shifted to sex. it tends to do that in these types of environments. maybe it is some strange fetish we have, “let’s taint this fine dining establishment with vile words of lust.”
two glasses of wine into me i cannot recall word for word our discussion of sex and sexuality. yet, we spoke in a normal tone, not caring if others heard us. i would giggle as we hushed when a waiter of bus boy came by. i would eye them as we are put on pause to continue our conversation.
“sometimes i look over at you and see you as an object, a toy. sometimes i want you mindless and without clothes.”
i would smile at him. i found his objectifying words arousing. we pushed each other to the limits with just how much to reveal to each other.
“you don’t know what goes on in my mind,” he gloats.
“you don’t have a clue E,” i respond.
we give each other this glare as to tell one another…”bring it”.
i recall telling him about fucking someone to their death. i recall telling him a little bit more about V.
E smiles and tells me that we are both fucked up. he begins to tell me how he would allow me to dom a guy. E would be sitting on the couch as this sub male of mine would walk in and ask for me. “she is in the back.” the man would look puzzled and walk to the bedroom. i would do my thing and as soon as the door closes behind him when he leaves, E would come in to the room and dom me.
“i really get off in spanking your ass like a 5 year old, stripping you down and sending you to bed,” he tells me with a grin. “i know you like it too.”
“i do,” as i laugh at his remark. i remember a few nights earlier when i came home grumpy and pouty. he turned me around, hands up against the wall as he ripped my pants down and spanked me. he told me to strip to my panties as he pointed to the bedroom and told me to go to bed. yes, i stomped off to bed and threw the covers over me as he finished doing what he was doing.
before i know it the dining room is growing empty as we are there well past closing. my head is light and before we stand to leave the conversation switches back to life.
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