Gracie\'s Playground

on the mend
Sunday March 09th 2008, 3:58 am
Filed under: Grace,Masturbation

the ending of last year and beginning of this year has been plagued with “business” and doctor visits. needless to say it kept my mind not so saturated with filth. i am happy to say the “denial” phase i went through indeed proved to be efficient as i do not have anything to worry about per se.

i realize i am probably talking very vaguely and i do intend to do so.

with all the riff in my dark and deviant little world it has proved to be very sexless and almost null of orgasms. i feared it was a loss of “drive” and finally this peak i hit nearing thirty has finally headed towards the downslope. perhaps i am in denial about my peak, not being so peak.

i had a surgery on the 21st of last month that was supposed to be “out of the office for one day” and now *counting the days* it has been almost three weeks and i am still out of the office. i won’t go into details and i am fine for the most part. i had to mention the surgery because of the lack of orgasms.

painstakingly slowly i am healing. the nature of my surgery and complication impeded upon my ability to masturbate or even have sex. however, tonight i had this urge, this determination to get off. i sought out a new toy sent to me right before my surgery. it was the hitachi vibrator type of device. while watching porn and letting my mind run wild, on the lowest setting i carefully pushed it between my legs and pressed. one hand went to coach my strained muscle as i felt myself climbing in seconds. my legs tensed, my abs tensed and cautiously i came panting.

i pulled the vibrator from between my legs and caught my breath. i felt such a needed release and needed to do it again. again, i pushed the vibrating bulb againt my clit and let it hum relentlessly. the second orgasm came faster than the first and i grunted through the wave while clutching my wound in the hopes it would not knot up.

i thought the second orgasm would be the end as i shut the vibrator off again. yet, the dread of an even number made me ache for a third. i laid there thinking about how ridiculous this scene would have been. a convalescing deviant trying to get off AND trying for an odd number of orgasms due to some strange compulsion for odd numbers. i almost laughed at myself. instead, i smirked and turned the vibrator on a last time to get off. the third orgasm was very light as if my body was trying to save me from knotting up my muscle.

in my weeks of healing i finally felt sated. i felt lighter instead of heavy with pain and immobility. there is a light to this tunnel and i hope at the end it will lead me straight for the darkness where i operate at my norm. i cannot wait to be 100% again. i miss running, fucking, masturbating, hot baths, stretching and being flexible. i hope that day comes so very soon.

so this is where i stand or lay.

on a interesting note i have been contacted to have parts of my blog published in a book with other compilations. i hope this venture will be a stepping stone to perhaps a dedicated book written by me. we shall see. more details will follow as i get them. i just signed the ok for the publisher to use my posts.

it is funny because i never found myself to be a grammar worthy writer, i am very hard on myself when it comes to writing and why i have such painful lulls. so, i always have a sense of shock when someone “likes” my writing.

it’s hard to not sound like a broken record on a sex blog, especially after two full years.

i can’t can this, not yet. like i have said, i feel something in the air. perhaps it is spring and with spring there is always new beginnings.

i will leave it at that.

Thank you Always Aroused Girl for Fleshbotting this post.

11 Comments so far
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So nice to hear from you. Deep wishes for continued recovery.

Comment by Al Sensu 03.09.08 @ 4:47 am

Good luck with your recovery and healing. I loved the honesty of your masturbation session, the little compulsions you have. And congrats on the publication. I assure you, you deserve it.

Comment by Chris 03.09.08 @ 6:50 pm

i wish you a speedier recovery my Dark One. Congrats on the publishing offer! That must be sooo exciting! I would be thrilled! Here’s to hoping it does create that book you’d like to write.

Comment by Mina 03.09.08 @ 7:24 pm

very erotic. i love your writing style. gonna be checking out your blog a lot from now on.

Comment by the happy husband 03.10.08 @ 11:03 pm

good luck on a healthy healing process. and don’t forget the healing powers of sex.

Comment by Wants & Needs 03.11.08 @ 7:54 pm

just as “wants & needs “said sex has its points as to helping to heal ,hope you have had a speedy recovery

Comment by mactileman 03.22.08 @ 11:02 am

Hello, Gracie:
I’m sorry I’ve lost track of you.
I’m glad you’re on the mend & Congrats on publishing..
..very glad to hear that. I love your writing.
I’m at wordpress now, too.
Drop in whenever you like…
I’ll be back, hun.

Take care,

Comment by will69b 03.28.08 @ 12:01 am

Gracie, I have been reading you on and off for quite some time now. I am glad to hear that you are on the mend. Congrats on the publishing offer. I do hope to someday read a book by you. I am sure it will be amazing!

Comment by Diana 03.31.08 @ 7:16 pm

i send my best wishes and hope you are feeling better.

i guess if you can’t masturbate as you like – time to enjoy each and every mind fuck just a little more.


ps – can i get an autographed copy *wink* *nibble* *lick*

Comment by woodinhand 04.01.08 @ 9:21 pm

I am so sorry that you have been enduring so much…
I have good thoughts and vibes headed your way.
cumming back from surgery can be a bitch i know..
we are here for you

Comment by shibari 04.09.08 @ 12:24 pm

Glad to hear your are feeling better.


Comment by RaesSecret 04.21.08 @ 8:49 am

Say what is on your mind
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