I can’t sleep.
I can’t relax.
I can’t sit still.
I’m aching. I watched the time tick by on my phone as I reviewed twitter, checked emails and looked at website stats. I just could not make my eyes heavy but my head started to hurt from reading on a tiny device in the dark.
I need a dose of pain. I need a dose of him. It has been too long and I’m un-sexily suffocating from me pushing the need to the side day after day. You can’t ignore a part of you that is, you. I didn’t want to panic but I wanted to sleep.
My brain wandered and I missed a certain blog from a certain individual. I Google to see if there is any trace of these sadistically pieced words that left my skin burning and my mind racing. Low and behold, it’s the first link on the hit list. I’m in luck, so I thought.
I combed through the archives because I knew specifically three posts that were burned into my memory banks. I find one and I read it savoring every word and punctuation. After I got to the end I gasped in the very late hours of the night. Clark was fast asleep and would be getting up in a few hours. I dread not being able to sleep but my body is on now. My mind wanted more. I looked for the second post and found it, this one more sadistic than the first one found. My fingers found my parted lips as I read and I felt a pain of longing between my legs. This is just torture yet there’s a slight comfort in reading someone’s experiences and thoughts. Being in his head for that moment calmed my mind just a little.
The last post took some time to find as I stopped, read other posts and skimmed reading key words that popped out at me in 3D like: “razor”, “blood”, “cut” and “pain”. Just as I found the last post that I wanted to read, I heard an alarm go off and I’m snapped out of this masochist trance. I couldn’t believe I had been up for hours reading like an addict and Clark saw the light shining on my serious face.
“Yeah, can’t sleep.”
“What are you reading?”
He got up to get ready for work. I decided I wouldn’t be able to work in the morning like this and sent off emails as needed. Clark took the opportunity to molest me for a few seconds and pecked my face before leaving.
I heard Clark’s car start and he pulled away. I nestled my head back against the blood red pillow, put the phone back on and read. My eyes were dreamy and heavy with lust. My heart was racing. My right hand tangled in my panties as I touched the smooth skin. I would grip my thigh, my hipbone or tug at the panties more. When I got to the end I let out a breath.
My hand reached down to the second drawer of the nightstand without looking. I shut the phone off, grabbed the vibrator, turned it on and pushed it against my clit. I closed my eyes playing out the words in my head and replacing her with me. I started to hold my breath as my orgasm climbed. Just when I thought I couldn’t hold my breath any longer my body exploded in the dark hours of the morning. I gasped for air, sucked in a big breath and my body convulsed as I shut off the vibrator. I lay there catching my breath and relished in deep thought but my eyes narrowed. It wasn’t enough. It’s never enough.
The vibrator came back on and my eyes were closed tight. I bit my bottom lip as I saw blood drip on 8mm, scratched black and white film in my mind. The dark thickness running from the cut and a tongue caught the heavy droplet. My breathing stopped again, the climb is harder and my skin is flushed and red. I come again moaning, huffing and puffing and sucking in more air. I pant as the vibrator turns off during the post orgasm autopilot mode. My whole mind and body react and curl up into a ball of emotions. The tears welled up in my eyes and I sob for a few seconds. This is nothing new for me; I regained my composure and fell asleep for a few hours.
“I should let you go home before it gets too late.” He said to my lips right before we kissed.
I knew he didn’t mean those words at all and I pushed my lips against his and it was a blur of making out and fucking. While his cock was buried deep inside he whispered between thrusts, “Next time we should use the plug.”
“I brought it with me,” I moaned back, “I want you to plug me and fuck me.”
He pulled out and I grabbed the bag that had been sitting by the bed all weekend. I unzipped and grabbed the Njoy plug and handed it to him.
“Do you need lube?” I asked without even thinking.
“No. There’s plenty here,” he said as he dipped the cold steel inside my soaked cunt and nestled the tip against my ass. I can’t express how much I love a man plugging my ass. I feel vulnerable. I feel extreme amounts of anticipation. I feel so very fucking aroused.
He started to push and I took in a deep breath. It had been a very long time since I had done anything with my ass. As he pushed I could feel the pain of my ass trying to accommodate the invasive plug. I would whimper and breathe but trying to keep in mind to keep aroused and just let it suck into my tightness. I almost panicked and had him pause for a moment. It was almost past the point of no return and I could feel it slide out and press against my asshole. I took another breath and nodded at him and he slowly pushed again. I closed my eyes and thought about how good it was going to feel with his cock inside me with my ass plugged. Slowly my ass opened and swallowed the plug snug.
“I want to suck your cock.” I slurred.
He moved his cock towards my mouth and I took him all the way to his balls. I could hear him gasp as his the head of his cock pressed into my throat. I felt his hand push inside my cunt and I came instantly. I could taste myself on his cock as I sucked him deep and gagging every so often.
“I need to fuck you.” He said breathy.
His cock left my mouth as he shifted his body back between my legs. I stared into his eyes as his cock pushed inside to an even more tighter cunt. My eyes started to roll back and I closed my lids as he pushed in the whole length. My body started convulsing with orgasms. I grabbed his body and held tight as he thrust in and out.
“Does it feel good?” I slurred.
“Yessss,” he hissed
“Can you feel the plug rubbing your cock?” I blurted.
“Yesss,” he hissed again.
“Fuck me from behind.”
He slid out and I turned over with my plugged ass in the air. His hands grabbed my ass and spread me open. I’m pretty sure he wanted a nice view of the metal handle poking from my ass. His cocked pushed its way in and hit all the way to my cervix. I let out a loud wail into the mattress.
“Use me,” I chanted over and over. I could feel his body tense and I knew he was going to come.
“Come inside me.”
Growling filled the air, as his edge disappeared from him. His body erupted as he came deep and gripped my body like an animal as he jerked hard to each spurt.
He collapsed beside me as I turned over and I wasn’t done yet. I’m never really done. I took his hand and pushed it between my legs. Two fingers shoved deep.
“Make me come,” I whispered into his ear as I hugged him close.
He has my cunt down with ease and I was bucking against his fingers within seconds. As I panted I pulled his fingers from my cunt and dragged them to my mouth. I looked in his eyes as I liked his cum and my wetness from his fingers. He smiled and gasped at the same time. I sucked and licked every bit off.
I still didn’t feel quite sated. I wanted one of those toe-curling orgasms. The plug nestled in my ass probably had a lot to do with it. I grabbed the bag next to the bed and pulled out my Lelo vibrator and he grinned.
“Talk dirty to me till I come.” I sweetly demanded while the vibrator revved up to its highest setting.
I positioned myself next to his ear and pushed the vibrator against my clit. He moaned in my ear and began to tell me of his night with a women just three days prior.
“She was about your height and her tits were fake,” he began.
“Did you suck them?” I asked with my eyes closed and envisioning every detail.
“Yes,” he answered. “She didn’t really kiss me but she got me worked up and moved her mouth down to my cock.”
I moaned listening to his recount as my free hand found its way to his hardening cock.
“She started to suck my cock and I was so hard. It was when she stopped and told me I could come in her mouth because she was a cock whore that I almost lost it.”
“Mmmmm, you almost came?” I asked pressing the vibrator harder against my clit.
“Yess and my mouth was buried between her legs. It didn’t take me much longer when I came deep in her mouth.”
“God,” I moaned, “Did she swallow?”
“No,” he answered, “She spit it out.”
“Did you want her to swallow your cum?” I asked on edge.
“Yesss,” he answered.
“I’mm, gonna, come,” I slurred and I started to cry out as I felt myself escape my own body and slowly fall back down to reality. I felt like a heap of mess on the bed and curled back into his body as my body vibrated from the aftershocks.
Eventually I forced myself to head home and as a token of the filthy night we had together, I decided to wear the plug during my long drive home. You know, to keep it interesting.
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Review: Lelo Elise 2
I fell in love with Lelo years ago after I bought my first vibrator (Gigi) from Good Vibrations. So when they contacted me to review their newer line of vibrators, I was more than willing to see what they have come up with.
Lelo shipped me the Elise 2. I never had the original Elise so I can’t say that this vibrator is better than the original Elise but I will say the Elise 2 is a very satisfactory vibrator.
I have used a range of vibrators from $13 to hundreds. I am fine with cheaper vibrators but they always left me feeling very numb afterward and they were very noisy. So, you are paying for quality and noise factors with the more expensive vibrators.
Ever since having the Elise 2 shipped to me, it’s the “go-to” vibrator for me. It feels silky, the noise is quiet and it gives me intense orgasms that lead into multiple orgasms. It’s like an echo after I come that makes me want to come again.
My vibrator sits in my nightstand drawer when it’s not drying by the bathroom sink. It beckons me when I see the pink flesh of the body. I slip the smooth pink down my panties and turn it on without effort, without looking, I have memorized the functions of each button. I nestle the body against my clit and I am lost in the moment.
I am on edge as I am feeling overwhelmed with emotion, lust and pleasure. I start to ache for a cock, ache for penetration and ache to be taken. My body shudders, my muscles tense and I can’t hold it any longer. I burst with an orgasm and push the vibrator inside my cunt that seals the deal. My body is a ball of a shaking mess and yet my clit is screaming and wanting to come again. I’m on edge and teetering, I push the vibrator back to the hard nub and I am coming again. I turn the vibrator off, drag it from my soaked panties and lie there panting and catching my breath. It doesn’t replace the real thing but it will do for now.
This post was featured on Fleshbot
Tuesday November 06th 2012, 8:35 pm
Filed under: Grace
I haven’t had an orgasm in well over a week. It could even be longer. I have lost count.
Why Dark Gracie? Why?
No privacy. That’s why.
I open up my nightstand drawer and my vibrator beckons me. I see a photo or read a sentence and my mind beckons me. I will hear a sound and my ears beckon me. I feel something warm or soft and my skin beckons me.
With life being so busy it’s so easy to fall into this lull of not masturbating or having sex. It’s the one thing a woman can forget about whereas a man has no “off” switch. At this point I feel like the average woman that seems to not put sex as a priority and will constantly push aside with, “not now dear”.
I think about sex all the time. I want sex all the time. I just have not had the opportunity or time to make it happen. It’s frustrating as I was dreaming of watching porn and masturbating last night. Just when I think I am going to sneak off and masturbate I will get an email or a phone call. Talk about cock blocking!
I do know for a fact that once the floodgates are opened; I am going to require endless amount of orgasms to make up for this drought. Me normally, should cause fear to a man but me after a dry spell, means big trouble for that man responsible for my pleasure. I am practically foaming at the mouth with lust. It’s plaguing my mind and infecting my insides. I don’t want orgasms; I NEED them.
Did I mention how grumpy I am because of the lack of release? Yes, I’m like the average woman PMSing and it’s not pretty.
In short my deviants, I need to be dealt with…hard.