as i read your words my left hand was wrapped under the blanket and
over the center of my warm and flushed chest. perhaps i was trying to
save myself as my heart raced and pounded inches beneath or my breath
irregular.

i feel as if i am running now as i can’t catch my breath. i feel
your words are stealing the air from my lungs. i almost feel panicked
with the sensation as if you are trying to suffocate me from afar.

how do i feel? you ask me with such sincerity. i feel a longing, i
feel sad, i feel exhausted, i feel dark.

*trying to catch my breath*

*lips parted as i try, try to regain a normal breathing pattern*

*eyes close*

*deep breath in*

*shuttered breath out*

*sigh*

*eyes open*

*shifting in the bed in an upright position to try to breath normal*

suffocating.

*panting*

suffocating

*panting*

*eyes close*

*open eyes*

*my left ring finger that is naked from ornaments goes to my mouth as
i glance upward at your words*

when you look at me, i feel your stare piercing me and right into my
vulnerable soul. my abrasive-ness is my wrapping and very few can shed
the layers. i am shy, i am scared, i am weak.

i want to unwrap you, i want you naked so we can see each other as god
intended. when i touch your flesh i want to be able to touch your very
essence.

*swallowing*

*lips parted*

*head tilted to the left*

*still breathing erratically*

*deep breath in*

i feel seduced because you write as if you were here whispering in my ear.

anticipation drives me to a new plane of existence. i read you and i
feel i am going to explode. my lips quiver and if you stay still you
can feel the slight shake of my body.

*rubbing my left eye with my left hand*

i fear tiredness is winning over me my sweet. i need to rest my head
on these two soft pillows. now you will roam this mind of mine till i
fall sleep. i wonder if you will invade my dreams…seeing right
through me.

*tracing bottom life with left finger*

*close eyes*

you see right through me.

*open eyes*

*breathing irregular*

i grabbed my phone and went straight for the bathroom. my heart was racing and i could feel my wetness hitting my panties. his text messages were aggressive, forward and sexual. i closed and locked the door, i yanked my pants and panties down without even unbuttoning or unzipping. i sat on the toilet spreading my legs, my fingers went straight for my wetness and circled my clit. the phone dialed him and we whispered our greetings and the heavy breathing followed. i rubbed while he moaned and talked to me. my responses were minimal, quiet and short yet my breathing sustained.

hearing his arousal, his need, made me squirm and close my eyes. i wanted to be anywhere private but here. i wanted him to hear me, i wanted him to know i needed him as much as he needed me. my muscles tensed every time he said my name, every time he said he loved me, every time he called me Baby. i love hearing him, i love getting inside of him, i love how my words can make his heart crumble to a million pieces.

he robs the breath from my lungs when i read his words. the blood rushes to my face when he talks filth in my ear. my heart flutters in my chest when i think about him consuming my mind. the world right now revolves around us and our 100 mph courtship.

i could hear voices outside the door, i couldn’t concentrate on him. i wanted to hear him cum for me and i had to cut the call short. he promptly texted me that i was “cruel” and that he felt that he could be damaged physically from such torment. i reassured him that i was a Dom and knew for a fact that he was not damaged.

we had to wait out the rest of the day aching for a release. the teasing only got worse and the anticipation grew with every word typed.

when i finally heard his voice with normal volumes i wanted to come right then and there. he makes me insatiable that i cannot stop once we start. i masturbated to near exhaustion and only then were we able to talk about the weather and simple pleasantries.

i have to admit i love this man.

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in my mind without nerves, without levels of self esteem and without fear i want you.

what does that mean?

it is me straddling your lap and enveloping you. it is me staring into your blue eyes with my hazel eyes. i want to see past the pupils and directly into your soul. i want to breathe you in. i want to touch your skin. i want to taste your lips and slip my tongue past them to greet yours. i want to feel your arousal grow and press up against me. i want to press down into you and kiss your being from your lips. i want to melt and mold into you. i want to consume every bit of you in one moment because i just cannot wait a second longer for you. the intensity that binds us causes no rational thoughts, it is lust and need that courses through our veins. the only logic is fitting the two pieces together that make us one.

that is what i mean when i say i want you.