an hour after he had used me i was already ready for me. it is funny, the more you get fucked, the more you want it. i think that holds true for me.

“tomorrow morning we’ll play before i have to go to work.”

i accepted his answer and went to bed.

the next morning i woke up before him and went to what i like to call my “fuck room” and checked emails. i had the tv on and lazily laid around in my panties waiting for him to wake up.

he slumbered into the room a little while later and laid beside me. i started to squirm against him and he knew. his hand would graze my warm skin and grope at my nipples or trail between my legs as i would thrust hungrily against his hand. he pushed my panties down and without haste i kicked them off.

he crawled between my legs, pushing them wide to accommodate him. he hovered over me like a beast as he rubbed his cock up and down my wet slit and slid it inside of me. there is nothing like the feeling of his cock, no matter how many dildos or vibrators he shoves in and out of me…it is his cock that i crave to fill and fulfill me. my nails dug into his broad back and i saw slightly flinch at the pain. i love gripping his back, his large arms. i feel safe with him and i feel so small beneath him. his head nuzzled into my neck as he raked his teeth against my sensitive flesh. i groaned and sucked in a mouthful of air as he bite and sucked. i tightened around his cock as i pulled my legs up to allow him full penetration. i never want him to stop as clenched his cock so tight with this dying need for him. i hate when he pulls out of me, it always sudden and too soon for me. this physical connection and intimacy makes me feel whole with him.

i turned over with my ass in the air tempting him to fuck me again. his hands dug into my hips as he pushed back inside of me and i always let out a gasp when i feel that first thrust. i pushed my face into the pillow and gripped the edge of the futon as he railed into me with a force of punishment. his right hand reached around and pulled on my breast as he didn’t hesitate with his rhythm. he squeezed and hissed at me. when i hear him i feel i am cumming over and over. i get so lost, yet so focused on him going in and out of me.

he slapped my ass and my head shot upward. his hands dug into my ass and spread me open. i love when it when he stares at my asshole. i always want him to take it and use it. it is rare. he only defiles my ass when he wants to put me in place and he knows i want it. it is one of those rare treats that he will take advantage of that “other” hole.

..

last night was the first night in a week that we were awake and in the same room at the same time. we were in the tub and i turned over to let him “wash” me. he ritually lathered the soap and trailed it between my ass and down my pussy. i waited patiently with my head at the edge of the tub resting against the wall pushing my ass further out of the water. i waited…and waited. hmmmm he never invaded my cunt. he got out of the water and was toweling off as i sat there still.

“hey, you didn’t wash me.”

“huh?”

“you didn’t put your fingers inside me like you usually do.”

we started talking about plans for the weekend as i heard him pushing on a latex glove on his hand. i had a slight grin. he knelt at the edge of the and pushed in his fingers as he continued talking to me. i gasped and pushed my head into the wall. he kept talking and realized i wasn’t responding as he dug into my cunt. i clenched and shook.

“spread your legs.”

i pushed them apart to the width of the tub as he pushed in another finger. i kept pushing my head against the wall and had nothing to grip. i couldn’t even squirm or move as my legs would make small waves in the tub water. he kept fucking my cunt with his fingers till i came clenching him.

he pulled out and i turned to my side with a smile as i watched him pull off the glove.

we have a lot of making up for lost time to do. i am not sure that will even happen this weekend. maybe tomorrow morning.

“close your eyes.”

i hate surprises and the unknown. i hated sitting there not knowing what was going on in and outside the bedroom. i was nervously talking through my hands covering my eyes.

“shut up bitch.”

i let out a nervous giggle.

“shut up you whore.” this time his voice was hissing and it was within feet of me. i closed my mouth and sunk into the bed. i felt so naked and seen even though i was wearing a tank top and panties.

“open your eyes.” i pulled my hands away slowly and pulled my eyes open. i yelped as i saw a knife in his hand pointing down at me.

“stay still.” he kept chanting. i was nervous and started to whimper.

“show me your neck.” i didn’t want to budge. i was terrified.

“show me your neck.”

“nu uh.” i was whimpering and pleading.

he took the strap of my tank top and cut it free. i shook and didn’t have time to react as he took strap and pinned my neck with it to my pillow. i gurgled as his hand pushed my panties to the side and slipped into my cunt. i felt a rushing fear blanket me as he let up the fabric grip from around my neck. i wondered for a split second if it would leave a bruise.

‘don’t you fucking move.” i felt the cold blade trace my skin down, down, down. he lifted my panties away from flesh as he cut them free. i let out a gasp as he cut my cunt free from my expensive panties. he proceeded to cut away the rest of my tank top exposing me like some rape victim. he grabbed a piece of the tank top and tied my hands together. my breathing was rapid as my body twitched at his gropes at my flesh.

his fingers resumed to violating my cunt while hissing obscenities at me. i felt myself coming over and over as my juices were backed up against his dam of flesh. he pulled out and replaced my void with the rabbit.

“open your mouth.”

i opened my mouth as i dared not look at what he was doing to me. he slipped my cum coated finger into my mouth as the rabbit buzzed away at my cunt. i started to suck myself clean from his fingers. he shoved in more fingers forcing my mouth open as he turned the rabbit on high. i squirmed and bit down on this fingers. my nails started to dig into my other bound hand. i couldn’t force him to stop, i couldn’t make him stop, i was helpless. my grunts were growing louder into mild screams of a mix of pain and pleasure. every time i was too loud for his liking he would cover my nose and mouth. i would feel my cum leaking from my cunt to my ass as i would thrust towards my invasion. as he often does, he suddenly stopped and pulled out of me. my cunt leaked and my body shuddered.

“get on the floor and masturbate.”

i pulled myself up and laid on my stomach on the ground. i laid there focusing, focusing on this image that i saw earlier that day. i felt his foot rest on my ass as he hovered over me like an owner. i felt him spit down my back to my ass. my body became rigid as i came so fierce that my eyes welled up with tears and mixed with my sweat covered face. i panted trying to catch my breath as my body went limp. i laid motionless on the floor as E left to the bathroom to start a bath.

as i felt some form of energy emerge inside of me, “you cut up a good pair of panties.”

“you can get more.”

you men…that is your answer for everything.

i am wondering if those that comment on this blog care if i respond to your comments? i am just curious if you go back and see what i wrote. i really don’t want to be wasting my time nor yours. so, please let me know.

what am i doing writing on this day? heh, would you believe that E had to work a double shift? i fought traffic to get home in a decent hour tonight, put my computer back together and just got the voice message that he had work. how nice. so his card and chocolate still sits untouched from this morning in the area where he leaves his wallet and keys.

hmmmm i was hoping for a night of fucking just because it sounded good to do. i have been fiending all day since this morning. not that i need a “lame ass excuse to spend money for supposed romance day” to fuck on.

my idea of valentines day…

new sex toys, scarves, razors, and a night of fucking. not “love making” i don’t do that. i really want to fuck. sweat, blood and tears. instead i get to get off the masturbation way tonight in a dark, cold house.

*sigh*

i hope someone out there is fucking tonight.

i cannot remember the last time i had a real cock inside of me.

i got this email from Py last week. it had the subject of “Valentine Cards you don’t want to get”. i open it up and stared at the various “cards”. i stumble on one that i just loved (yes i am wrong like that). i had to wait since the 8th to post this! so i wanted to wish you all a happy heart day…till death.

on the sex front…E and i were in the tub the other night. he decides to push his fingers inside of me while i was sitting there. i swear i almost prefer his fingers over anything. my head smacked against the wall as he pushed in and out of me. my mouth dropped open as i tried my best to stay still. the water started to shift as my legs shook roughly. i tried to grip the slick tub and ended banging my head against the wall again as my back arched.

his finger slid out and rubbed methodically on my clit. i started to crawl backwards out of the tub, at least i tried. my legs were pushing against him and finally i couldn’t take it anymore and pushed my hand down between my legs to stop him. he starred at me with a grin and got out of the tub.

closing my eyes i listened to you feeling you sucking my erect cock. my pet taking me in his whorish mouth to get me off to get my cum to drink down eagerly.  i started to gasp at the vision and snapped out of it abruptly. i couldn’t get off just yet, it was too soon.

“stop” i kicked you back on to your ass.

you looked confused and almost hurt.

“aww don’t look at me like that pet. come here.” i pat the bed beside me.

i followed your eyes from mine, down my arm to my hand panting the bed. was it a test? was i going to kick you again? you knew the bed was off limits to you.

“V, it’s ok come here.” i almost laughed at your hesitation.

you still hesitated as you slowly and methodically pulled yourself on to the bed. you looked tense as you sat there shifting your eyes and waiting for that moment of explosion to get off the bed.

my hand pet the top of your head. “my pet relax. i am not going to shoo you off the bed.”

“y-yes, grace.”

my hand grabbed a handful of your hair and pulled you back as i straddled you in one sweeping motion. you trembled beneath me with shock on your face.

“open your mouth.”

i watched you shoot your mouth open with your tongue out. i dropped a glob of spit on to your tongue.

“swallow.”

your tongue moved back in, closed your mouth and i heard the slightest moan in your throat. i felt your cock twitch against my stomach.

“you like that pet? swallowing whatever i put in that slutty mouth of yours?” my lip curled slightly. “no matter what i do to you, you manage to find a way to get off on it. i could be choking you to death and you would beg for me to do it all the way through with a raging hard on.”

your face switched back to a timid fear. if i could hurt you with my stare it was at that moment that i saw through you. i didn’t even see a man beneath me, you were a mere toy for my disposal. at times i have wanted to eliminate you but i have to rethink my tossing you away to go whore for another.

“i fucking own you pet. sometimes you make me want to rip you apart till you are unrecognizable.” my words were spitting on your face as you learned not to flinch because that just made it much worse. “i want to fucking break you, literally fucking break you so you are a broken fucking toy that no one would want, not even me.”

your bottom lip started to quiver ever so slightly but i saw it. your eyes started to glaze over and you didn’t blink because the tears would escape the pool.

“yes pet, give me your tears of hurt. come on pet do it.”

you lip trembled more and you blinked once and opened your eyes big again. the tears spilled from the corners of your eyes down to the bed.

“yessss my bitch…you look like a bitch right now.” i shifted about you grabbing my cock and slowly stroking it against your skin.

your eyes started to shift. away from my glaring eyes that were fixated on the tears welling in your eyes. “goddamn you bitch, i am going to fucking rape you. i fucking wanna pull you apart one ounce of dignity at a time.”

i pressed my cock head to your tight cunt. “yeah i am gonna fuck you like a little timid bitch right now. i wanna see your face writhe as i rape your goddamn slutty cunt you fucking bitch.” i snarled at you as i forcefully shoved the pink cock all the way in your ass without lube, without ease.

“UNNNNG!”

your head jerked back into the bed as you closed your eyes tight with more tears seeping out the creases. your hands gripped the bed and your face slowly was turning a deep red. i pushed in and out with full strides in and out of your cunt.

“look at me you fucking bitch,” i hissed as i slapped your face with all the power i could muster with my right hand. i watched your head jerk to my motion and you straightened it upward and slowly forced your eyes to open. “yesss look at who is raping you right fucking now.”

my face had to be twisted into a menacing evil. i could see the fear in your eyes as they were forced to stare at me. my teeth were bared and clenched. my nails dug into your stomach as i would glance down at my invasive cock.

“mmmmmm yes, look at your virgin blood on my cock. yeah i fucking broke that cunt you fucking slut. don’t you look away goddammit!” another slap to your face and this time your hand reached up to nurse that burn.

“look at you laying there so fucking helpless and shocked. you are such a bitch pet. awww look even your cock is shocked getting soft…good. i only wish i had real cum, real DNA to leave in that cunt of yours. would ya go crawling to the emergency room and tell em you got raped pet?”

you shook your head slightly from side to side.

“hmmm that’s too bad.” i made a hard shove back into your cunt and you grunted at the pain. “come on baby you wanted it, you have been wanting my cock all night. such a fucking tease sucking me off like that.”

i started to laugh wildly. my hands clamped down on to your chest, digging my nails into your flesh and slowly scraped downward. your screams filled the room.

“yes pet how does that fucking feel?”

i pulled my cock out, stood up on the bed while grabbing your hair and pulling you to the ground.

“get on your fucking knees bitch and suck me off.”

you were breathing heavy and moved on to your knees weakly. you slowly opened your mouth with fresh hesitation.

“i said,” grabbing the back of your head with both hands. “suck,” pulling you on to my cock. “me,” pulling you off. “off,” pulling you back on to my cock as i fucked your throat. you started to gag violently and i kept you on my cock till you started to vomit around my cock.

“heh, look at the mess you made my pet.” my voice was calm. you looked up at me as i smiled down at you. “clean yourself up and clean up this mess.” i undid the harness and dropped it on the floor with the mess.

i sat back on the edge of the bed as if nothing happened. i picked up the phone and pulled it to my ear. “how did you like that?” you could hear some talking but could not make out if the voice was male or female. “good then,” i replied. “when do you want to pick him up?